I have alcoholism in my family. When my Dad finally went into a 30 day in-patient treatment, I was still a sophomore in college. I was very much like you. An athlete (played D3 soccer), so I was working out, and in great shape, but wouldn't touch alcohol during the week - when I first got to college, my drinking was all done on the weekends. Then when I was of legal drinking age (US 21 years) then it started to creep into Thursday, then eventually I was drinking Wed-Sat, drying out Sunday and then cramming all my homework and studying into three days just to get ready for the weekend again.
One of the things they do is a screening. You fill out a long survey - How do you drink, when you drink? When do you drink? How often are you drinking, etc. I fill it out based on my current activity.
Counselor sits me down, and starts telling me that I'm not an alcoholic YET, but I'm clearly heading that way. I do abuse alcohol on a regular basis and these are the behaviors they look for and she basically told me if I continue doing what I doing? I will be there in a few years. I was 22 or 23 at the time. I kind of shrugged it off. Dad continued in and out of rehab while I continued doing what I was doing.
Then the wheels fell off for my Dad. Like really bad. Disappeared for a week, Mom couldn't find him, started getting worried. Found him in a shady hotel on the edge of town. He was trying to drink himself to death. We got there, got him into the psych ward and they forcibly detoxified him. He was basically under medical house arrest until he sobered up and vowed this was indeed the end.
I finally had a front row seat to see what my future was. My mom pulled me aside that Christmas in the midst of our entire extended family at my parents house celebrating. She grabs my arm and pulls me into a room, looks me dead in the eyes and says, "If you want to put someone you love through what your father just put our family through these last two years? Then keep drinking, keep partying and doing whatever you're doing." and then just walked away from me.
That was pretty much it. I decided a few weeks later to put a cap on it, I had a good run, but gambling with my future like that? No thanks. Been sober 14 years. Sure I have a beer here and there, but its only one (I'm a total lightweight now, so its no fun) and then that's it. And I never judge the people I'm around if they want to drink.
I would tell you what the nurse told me. It sounds like you do abuse alcohol, and you're heading down that road. Is your future predetermined? I don't think so, but it took a litany of close calls and the one major episode with my Dad to make me realize what was happening and change course before it was too late.
But people that drink I don't believe that it is only alcohol that is their demise.
There was probably whole range of feelings your father had that led him to that.
Cannot blame anyone but your father would be the only person that could explain it. Because people are so different and even if you think you know your father, there is bunch of emotions that are outside of anyone that can comprehend.
Well it is true also for EMO kids as we are ale separate entities struggling with life.
I have alcoholism in my family. When my Dad finally went into a 30 day in-patient treatment, I was still a sophomore in college. I was very much like you. An athlete (played D3 soccer), so I was working out, and in great shape, but wouldn't touch alcohol during the week - when I first got to college, my drinking was all done on the weekends. Then when I was of legal drinking age (US 21 years) then it started to creep into Thursday, then eventually I was drinking Wed-Sat, drying out Sunday and then cramming all my homework and studying into three days just to get ready for the weekend again.
One of the things they do is a screening. You fill out a long survey - How do you drink, when you drink? When do you drink? How often are you drinking, etc. I fill it out based on my current activity.
Counselor sits me down, and starts telling me that I'm not an alcoholic YET, but I'm clearly heading that way. I do abuse alcohol on a regular basis and these are the behaviors they look for and she basically told me if I continue doing what I doing? I will be there in a few years. I was 22 or 23 at the time. I kind of shrugged it off. Dad continued in and out of rehab while I continued doing what I was doing.
Then the wheels fell off for my Dad. Like really bad. Disappeared for a week, Mom couldn't find him, started getting worried. Found him in a shady hotel on the edge of town. He was trying to drink himself to death. We got there, got him into the psych ward and they forcibly detoxified him. He was basically under medical house arrest until he sobered up and vowed this was indeed the end.
I finally had a front row seat to see what my future was. My mom pulled me aside that Christmas in the midst of our entire extended family at my parents house celebrating. She grabs my arm and pulls me into a room, looks me dead in the eyes and says, "If you want to put someone you love through what your father just put our family through these last two years? Then keep drinking, keep partying and doing whatever you're doing." and then just walked away from me.
That was pretty much it. I decided a few weeks later to put a cap on it, I had a good run, but gambling with my future like that? No thanks. Been sober 14 years. Sure I have a beer here and there, but its only one (I'm a total lightweight now, so its no fun) and then that's it. And I never judge the people I'm around if they want to drink.
I would tell you what the nurse told me. It sounds like you do abuse alcohol, and you're heading down that road. Is your future predetermined? I don't think so, but it took a litany of close calls and the one major episode with my Dad to make me realize what was happening and change course before it was too late.